how much for the monkey?

ej had a stoop sale today and i stopped by to get a little fresh air, sunshine, and interaction out amongst humanity. it's funny what we thought would sell and what actually sold. i thought for sure the first things to go would be the baker's rack and the cool t-shirt with the 70's style graphic of a man with an afro doing kung fu that says "clobber the mob -- black belt jones". or maybe the stylin' kangol hats or at least a few of the vinyl records. but no. the first thing to go was a pair of used mens shoes. two extension cords. a dusty, plastic plant.

some hip dude in sunglasses, dressed in black was checking out the menswear, then kept on walking only to return two seconds later to ask, "how much for the monkey?". a small, furry monkey sat atop the baker's rack, smiling pleasantly upon the passersby. he sold for 50 cents. i enjoyed watching that guy hand over two quarters so that he could clutch that little monkey as he strolled down 7th avenue.

the neighborhood zany lady stopped to ask about the red, fold-out, chinese fan.
"where did that come from?"
"chinatown."
"was it in a chinese restaurant?"
"no."
"because i want to know if it had pesticides sprayed on it."
"no, it's pesticide-free."
so she bought it.

and then there were the two boys that stopped to do some serious shopping. they were both about 12 years old. one was looking through the records, but the other was asking about the flask. he explained that the one he had at home was broken. a hole in the bottom. it looked as if there was going to be a sale, but he put it down when he spied a treasure: a used wok. it was hidden under two very used frying pans, but he brought it out for a better look. he was very excited. to his friend, "look! a wok!"
"a what?"
"a wok! you know, for chinese food."
"ohhh. a wok." the friend laughs.
"how much for the wok?"
"a dollar!"
his friend: "a dollar! you can pay that!"
as he paid for his wok, this boy, this non-asian, curly-haired boy spoke mandarin to ej. "how are you?", he asked. luckily, ej knows a few phrases and was able to respond in chinese. satisfied, the boy walked off with his friend and his new wok, throwing a last "xiexie" (thank you) over his shoulder.

it was a good day to be out amongst humanity.

the hairball of happiness

yesterday, i visited dean and gypsy. more than good friends, they are my family in new york. they are also my landlords. dean is a veteran of the stage and i enjoy asking him what new york was like back in the day. yesterday, we talked about when he was new to the big bad city. his first visit was in 1944 and he was here for about a month, by which time his savings had dwindled down to just the train fare back to oklahoma. he moved here permanently in 1947, and he remembers that the subway cost only a nickel. of course, there was no air conditioning on the trains back then, so he would ride in between the cars to at least feel the movement of air, hot as it was. this was apparently also a very good spot to warm up the ol' vocal chords on the way to an audition. the image of a young dean standing between subway cars, singing at the top of his lungs, his hair wild with the rush of air as the train hurtles through dark underground tunnels makes me very happy.

he referred to me as a little "ball of happiness" when i was saying goodbye. considering my own moptop, i suggested that "hairball of happiness" might be more accurate, and he laughed. then he started singing to the tune of "bluebird of happiness", but inserted "hairball" instead. we all laughed. they might think that i stop by to be nice or to do dean a favor since he's recovering from a massive stroke. the reality is that hearing dean's stories of days gone by does me even more good than his telling does him.

i dare you to cross that line

wow.
i have so much to learn about the world of blogging. i just took a cruise through a few "blogs of note", and they look very professional -- high quality photos, games, polls, links to all sorts of things. i don't really want to clutter up my blog, but i do want it to look more personal than the standard template that i chose, so i've added a photo to my header. i've no idea how to transform it into a long, sleek rectangle like the ones i've seen, and heaven forbid i actually go to the "help" section to find out. no, no, i must learn through trial and error.

i don't know why i'm stuck in this "i can do it myself" mentality. i didn't really realize how much it pervades so many parts of my life until now. a friend suggested that i ask my parents for a loan to finance the purchase of a digital slr camera. if i can't afford it on my own, using my own methods, then i feel i shouldn't own it, even though i've been wanting to upgrade from my point-and-shoot for over a year. i'm reluctant to even use this as an example because at some point my parents may read this entry and i don't want it to seem as if this is some backhanded way of asking for a loan. and how long did it take me to ask actor friends for references in my search for an agent? how many letters to agents did i send out cold, asking for representation? lots. and how many replies? zero. i was even reluctant to go see a doctor yesterday, and why? because i thought i could heal myself? would it hurt to ask for a little assistance once in a while?

i think there's a fine line between self-reliance and pride. and even typing "i think i need to make sure i don't cross that fine line" leads me to believe that i've already crossed into pride. maybe it's not about asking for help at all. maybe it's simply a reluctance to admit that i too am human.

jeez. what an ego.

your intestines and you

ej had been nagging me to go, and so i did.

this morning, after over two weeks of some mystery abdominal pain, i finally went to see a doctor. dr. patel told me that i have colitis. woohoo! my intestines are inflamed! after leaving $100 and a vial of blood behind, i picked up my antibiotics and went home.

no wonder why i've been so tired lately. i thought it was just my body aging, although i'm sure it's some of that too. thankfully, it doesn't affect my appetite.

at least, i have a good excuse for not exercising.
for now.